ARE YOU ALIVE BUT NOT LIVING? HOW TO LET GO OF WHAT'S EATING YOU UP INSIDE

I am crying. Why am I crying? Why do I feel this way?
I feel empty.
I want to experience real joy. How do we experience real joy?
Why do I feel like such a different person?
Why do I feel less and less of myself?
I want real joy.
I am in so much pain. I have had a long terrible day.
I see how I can offer myself in service in certain ways. So why don't I do that?
How do I dedicate my life to service?
I want to serve.
I want to give my life.
I am in too much pain. I do not like how I feel.
I am not going to call anyone. I do not want to call anyone. I do not have anyone to call. What would I do? Call them to cry on the phone? No thank you. I would cry on my own.
I used to have dreams. Big dreams. I am even living some of them now. Yet I am so sad. I am so down. I am sitting down here crying.
I need help.
I am tired.
I am tired of coming back here. I am tired of holding myself back.
I do not want to keep on holding myself back.
I am so sad.
Why am I so sad?
I realize that I want better for myself and my family. I say I want better yet I do not push myself to do better. I lack the will to do anything. Why do I lack the will? Where did my zest for life and enthusiasm go to?
Where do I go from here?
How do I move from here?
What do I really want?
What is my life's purpose?
What on earth am I here for?
Answer me!

Can you answer any of these life questions above? Please share your thoughts in the comments below.